By Genesis 31, Laban's sons have begun to notice that all of Jacob' wealth has come from their father, and the family attitude towards him has become slightly frostier. Jacob realises this, and God tells tim to return to the home of his father, so he makes plans to leave. Jacob means "deceiver" and he certainly lives up to that epithet here, gathering his wives, children, servants, possessions and livestock in secret, and leaving without telling anyone. He also tells Rachel that it is God that has given him Laban's flocks, when the previous chapter had made it clear that he gained them through his own scheme. He doesn't just lie and misrepresent himself, he also misrepresents God. We too can be guilty of that, and it can be hugely destructive. How many people have been put off God by bad experiences with believers? We must be honest about ourselves, but we must also be honest about God.
When Laban realises that Jacob has snuck off, he chases after him. After a confrontation, Laban and Jacob decide to make an agreement, that Jacob will take care of Laban's daughters, and that they will each stay on their side of the stones they have set up. As they make their vows, Laban reminds Jacob that God is a witness between them. It's a detail that's easy to forget but important to remember. "What they don't know can't hurt them" can never be an excuse for betraying someone - they might not know, but God does and it hurts Him.
Having made this agreement with Laban, Jacob decides to make peace with another member of his family and sends sends messengers to Esau, asking that he may find favour in his eyes. The messengers return to Jacob saying that Esau is coming to meet him with four hundred men. Jacob is terrified by this, presuming that Esau is coming to attack him, so he divides the people and livestock with him into two group so that if Esau attacks one, the other can get away. And then he does what he should have done in the first place. He prays. He asks God to protect him and reminds Him of the promises He has already made. Like Jacob, we have a right to hold God to His promises, and we can remember them as assurances in difficult times.
Jacob clearly still doesn't feel totally assured though, because he sends men to meet Esau with gifts, and he moves his family to safety across the brook. He still doesn't quite trust God enough to leave everything in his hands, he still has a little niggle of doubt, so he tries to sort things out by himself. Maybe it is because of this lack of faith that while Jacob is alone that night, a man comes to Jacob, and wrestles with him until dawn. Finally, the man wins by touching Jacob's hip and wrenching it out of its socket, and then he tells Jacob that his name will now be Israel, which means "he struggles with God". Because Jacob has not fought any ordinary man. He has wrestled with God. So often we feel guilty about our doubts and questions, and so we try to suppress them and plough through on our own, but we don't have to do that. God wants us to wrestle with Him. And when we do we will come away changed. Sometimes that change may be hard - Jacob came away tired and limping, and sometimes we will come away feeling challenged or humbled - but it will be worth it.
In chapter 33, Jacob and Esau finally meet again, and things don't go quite as Jacob was expecting. Instead of atttacking him or demanding recompense for his stolen blessing, Esau runs to him and embraces him, and only accepts Jacob's gifts after much insistence. He doesn't say it in so many words, but Esau has clearly forgiven his brother and is delighted to see him again. All of Jacob's fears prove unfounded, as so many of ours prove to be.
Esau then sets of back to his home in Seir, and Jacob says he will follow him slowly, moving at the pace of the flocks and the children. And so he travels on, setting up home first at Succuth then in Canaan. Here, his daughter Dinah is raped by a man named Shechem, who then demands that his father gets him Dinah to be his wife. He thinks he can marry her as though nothing has happened. But while a sin may be forgiven, it cannot be undone or easily forgotten, and things cannot always continue as they were. Our actions have consequences.
The consequences of Shechem's actions are that Dinah's brothers decide to make him pay for what he did to their sister. They promise that he can marry her, but only if he and the all the men of the city are circumcised. The men agree to this, and then three days later, while they are still in pain, Dinah's brothers enter the city and kill every male then plunder the city. The brothers clearly overreact, but at the same time Jacob appears to do nothing. Is either response right? Maybe they could have found a middle way, choosing justice over revenge or apathy.
God then tells Jacob to return to Bethel, where He had appeared to him before. Jacob obeys, and when he gets to Bethel, he builds an altar and God appears to him again, repeating His promises and again naming Him Israel. They do not seem to remain in Bethel long because this was a detour, not a destination. God just wanted to take Jacob aside and remind him of who He is and what He has done for him. Sometimes He'll take us on little detours too. He'll put us in a job or a town or a church we don't like, and it may not be obvious why at the time, but God will have something He wants to teach us. We just need to be open to it.
So Jacob and co move on again, but while they are on their way to Ephrath, Rachel dies giving birth to her second son, Benjamin. Jacob buries her, and they continue on their journey. Then his eldest son Reuben sleeps with on of his concubines. Jacob hears of this, but he doesn't seem to do anything. Jacob appears to have stopped reacting to anything. Dinah's rape, Rachel's death, Reuben's betrayal...none of them seem to elicit any response. Why is this? Has he stopped caring? Is he too afraid? Too indecisive? Or has he finally started trusting that God knows what He's doing?
Jacob finally arrives back at the home of his father, Isaac. It's not clear how much later, but at some point after Jacob's return, Isaac dies at the age of one hundred and eighty. He is described rather beautifully as "old and full of years". I love the idea that he was filled with all of the years he's lived, and the things he'd done and seen and experienced. What a wonderful epitaph that would make.
Genesis 36 details the line of Esau. There are so many names it makes my head start to swim, but some of the information appears to be repeated two or three times. The idea of family and that sense of coming from somewhere, being part of something, are really important. Verse 24 also contains a reference to a story that is not in the Bible, but which the writer assumes his audience will know. It's just a quick reminder that important as it is, the Bible is not the only truth, it is not all.
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